grooliest:

His headphones aren’t even plugged in

(via thebookthief6277)

sherlollysmooch:

annafromcraigslist:

Cosmo tip inspired by 50 Shades #2: Stab him in the ass with a fork.

But what about his hand, Cosmo? 

(via nerd-in-the-tardis)

hsuoring:

wetbottom:

wetbottom:

one time i had a crush on a boy and he knew but he didnt like me back so on april fools he asked me out as a joke and i said yes but then he said april fools so i punched him in the face

please do not tell me i was wrong for punching him. i had very deep feelings for him. he knew that i did and he took advantage of that to humiliate me. i had every right to knock his sorry fucking teeth out

Proper measures were taken and I encourage everyone to follow this example

(via music-geek-fandom-freak)

“In Roman community baths, it was customary for men to stand and applaud when a well-endowed peer entered the water.”

why are men so weird everywhere always (x)

i just imagined this and cannot stop loling

(via retconcorps)

(via 4everin2midnight)

thejabberwocki:

If you ever get frustrated with your writing, just remember that Tolkien once described Feanor as
“wounded with many wounds”

(via thebookthief6277)

squintymisha:

Endless list of things that should have been in the movies
↳ Prisoner of Azkaban, p 185

Hermione went very red, put down her hand and stared at the floor with her eyes full of tears. It was a mark of how much the class loathed Snape that they were all glaring at him. because every one of them had called Hermione a know-it-all at least once. 

(via proud-member-of-hermits-united)

peaceful-moon:

dirtyhippieproductions:

Let children walk with nature, let them see the beautiful blendings and communions of death and life, their joyous inseparable unity, as taught in woods and meadows, plains and mountains and streams of our blessed star, and they will learn that death is stingless indeed, and as beautiful as life, and that the grave has no victory, for it never fights.” - John Muir

☮  ❤ ॐ

best post i’ve seen all day

edwad:

which boob is the clitoris

(via rachkin)

portraitsofboston:

     “I was raised in a Christian family, and I asked the minister one day, ‘How can Jesus save me?’ His reply to me was, ‘You shouldn’t be asking questions like that—you sound like a no-good-managed boy.’ I went home and said to my father, ‘You know, daddy, I’m going to leave the church and find out for myself if there is any such thing as God.’
     “And what I found out is that there is a God. I’ve been shot at, I’ve been cut at, I’ve been knocked down, I’ve been stomped on, and I don’t have a scratch on me. A guy walked up to me one night, pulled out a gun and said, ‘Nigger, if you don’t get on your knees and beg me for your life, I’m gonna kill you right here on the spot.’ Something came over me and said: ‘This man is not God. You can talk your way out of this.’ So I did. Then I grabbed the gun, put it to his head and pulled the trigger to kill him—but it jammed. I looked at it and realized it was a pellet gun. I’m thankful that I don’t have that blood on my hands.
     “I’ve learned over the years to be slow to anger and swift to knowledge. Life is good, and it’s too short to find yourself on the side of foolishness. I’ve learned to get up and leave if I spot trouble coming. There is enough trouble going on in the world—I don’t need more of it.”

(via hippos-the-dark-side)